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Deja Vu, Bad Dreams and a Weight Loss Phenomenon


Ok. So I have been missing in action for a while. I really did not realize that it had been so long since I last posted (well, until my sister e-mailed me with "um... did you really last post on your blog in March?!"). I'm sorry I haven't posted, but I have been busy experiencing deja vu. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines deja vu as "something overly or unpleasantly familiar". Based on that definition, I guess you could say that losing the same 5 pounds all over again qualifies as deja vu. 

So here is how my nightmare began. I decided (in all my infinite wisdom) to go stay in Atlanta for a few days with my sister. No kids, no hubby, no exercise routine, and apparently.... no self-control. In those few days I treated myself (approx. 27 times) to fine dining, tasty treats and sweet, sultry beverages. Imagine my surprise when I returned home to find out I had gained almost 5 pounds? How the hell does one manage to gain 5 pounds in 3 days? (Answer: fresh strawberry cobbler, creamy shrimp and grits, turkey, cranberry, and stuffing sandwich on a homemade croissant.... oh and did I mention the grilled pork chops with brandy-glazed apples?). 


I was mad and disgusted with myself. I decided there was no way I was blogging until I got those 5 pounds back off. I mean really, what would I have blogged about? The fact that the chubby artist was now chubbier? Or (big surprise) the fact that the chubby artist loves food and has a tendency to stuff her face? So for the past few weeks I have been losing those 5 crappy pounds. The good news (if there is any) is that they are finally gone and I can now move on to new territory. I am focusing all my energy and effort on losing 6 pounds. That will put me at 25 pounds lost (and place me a third of the way toward my goal). Ultimately, I would like to lose 2 pounds a week to reach my goal in 3 weeks. But with my luck it will probably take 3 months (especially if I have the pleasure of losing some of the pounds over & over again..... sorry, I'm a little bitter). Ok. Ok. Confession? Check. Goal? Check. Now lets discuss some bad dreams.


As you know from previous posts, I have been exercising like I have mad cow's disease (frequent, frantic and to the point of complete exhaustion). I am sore ALL of the time. There is never a time when something on me does not hurt. Every night I lay my throbbing, sore, achy body down and try to get some sleep. Unfortunately, my stupid body has major issues (remember when it tried to save me from starvation mode even though I have enough butt for two people?) and has therefore decided to translate the pain into bad dreams. So every night I now toss and turn, unconsciously inserting my aching arms and legs into some strangely bizarre dream. My favorite bad dream (so far) occurred two nights ago. In this dream I was running through the woods (where the Ewoks live) being chased by stormtroopers. I felt nervous and anxious all night as I hid among the large ferns hoping they would not find me. Of course in the dream my aching arms, legs and neck were a result of all the running and crouching. I was truly Princess Leia (without the buns and the skinny body). Of course this new side effect is leaving me completely exhausted. *Sigh* Starvation mode, deja vu weight loss and bad dreams. Isn't weight loss fun?


And finally lets end with a weight loss phenomenon. I know I've had a lot to say today but I have missed blogging and am on a roll (so bear with me). Anyway, I have been researching a lot of weight loss stories lately (chubby girl + desperation + dissertation = the ultimate fat researcher). In some of the most successful stories where a formally fat person is now skinny, the formally fat (now skinny) person would explain that they changed their diet, increased their exercise routine and "the weight just fell off". Um.... what is this weight loss phenomenon and where can I get some? In what alternative universe does the weight "just fall off"? I know this is not a myth and does seem to occur with a few "chosen" people such as Nicole Brewer from The Biggest Loser (who lost 87 pounds in 12 weeks at home, not on the ranch with trainers)!  Seriously? In 14 weeks I have only lost 19 pounds (some of which I got to lose twice). She literally lost a middle schooler in 12 weeks while I have only lost a really fat chihuahua. I know 19 pounds is a pretty nice accomplishment, I know the slower you lose it the better chance you have of keeping it off, and I know that jealously is not attractive. But why can't I obtain my really fabulous body in 12 weeks too? Patience may be a virtue but instant gratification is also pretty damn sweet and satisfying. Or at least I imagine it is. 

Fat people are harder to kidnap t-shirt can be found at Fat Guy Shirts
7% Fat Free t-shirt can be found at Uncle Frog's Gifts & Apparel
Stormtrooper picture (and info) can be found at this website
Nicole Brewer pics and interview can be found at People's TV Watch

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

reading this while really not wanting to go to the gym . . . thanks for the push! (And a few giggles)

X.I.R said...

My pleasure anonymous! I lie to myself all the time by pretending that I really want to go to the gym (when all I really want to do is eat a box of donuts). Have a great workout!

Felicia said...

LOL girl, I am so with you! And, um, that t-shirt is not entirely correct up there at the top. I'm thinking Silence of the Lambs here :)

X.I.R said...

Ha ha, Felicia! I had forgotten about Silence of the Lambs (I mean really, how many kidnappers are just in the market for excess skin?) :) pretty funny.....

Expressions By Devin said...

I love the shirts you found.you have a wonderful blog thanks for sharing it with me:0)

X.I.R said...

(Smile) Thanks Devin, your blog is great too!

Christopher said...

Okay, okay, those few days you were here, we did...I must admit...act like two junkies at a heroine bust! We doused ourselves in creamy sauces, bathed in rivers of decadent sweets and damn near drowned ourselves in fat.... I gained 5 lbs. too but I think I have gone beyond weight loss deja vu. Those 5 lbs. are hanging in there like a hair in a biscuit!

No, no, I believe I am in the 7th ring of chubster hell! I am in a state of perpetual desperation to get these 5 lbs. back of my already too large arse! But I haven't yet found that drive I had before you came to visit...the one that made me attempt to run (yes only for a few feet) while speed walking, or the inspiration to lift the nautilus weights collecting a wide variety of dust bunnies in my guest bedroom.

My God I think I have a forbidden food hangover! I simply cannot get motivated again! I think I am going to force myself to get on the scale this Saturday...nothing motivates like that horrible three digit number.

By the way, I also blame you (like any good older sister would do). Because you neglected your blog (my center of motivation) I was unable to loose my 5 lbs. So shame on you and don't let it happen again (or I may sit on you with this very large arse)!

..and yes this is the Chubby Artist's Chubby Sister...my doh doh head husband messed with the google account

sassyglassdesigns said...

You and your sis both have a wonderful way with words. I always look forward to your posts because they make me smile and chuckle....not because of your struggle but because of the way you describe it. Trust me I have lost and found my share of 5 pounds (+ some) over the years. Unfortunately, they have all taken up permanent residence.

A Dreams-Teller said...

Just wondering...do you dream of food when asleep? If so, what kind?

X.I.R said...

Sis,

You are blaming me? Seriously? You were the host and therefore should have been cooking meals like salmon with grilled asparagus. Haven't you ever seen Martha Stewart? :)

Hi sassyglass! Thanks for the compliments on our writing (for both myself and sis). My pounds want to take up permanent residence AND want to invite new friends!


A dreams-teller,
Surprisingly, I don"t dream about food (too busy running through the forest with the Ewoks I guess). However, I do think of food when I'm awake which sucks. My day dreamy food? A molten chocolate cake from Chili's *Eeewhh... I think I'm drooling*

esque said...

OMG, those T-shirts made me laugh! Yeah, I wish my lbs would just fall of too, but stress is interfering! Losing 19lbs is quite an accomplishment!

Glitzer said...

Hey hey! By the way you have been doing so well and I think an occasional indulgence is good!

I totally agree with you that sometimes when I go to the gym I think about the next binge I can go for.. naughty huh? I read a recent article, a lady tried to lose weight, in order to make herself engaged in her workout. She started to watch a series of soaps in her workout. Every time she goes for a work out she will watch an episode of Sex and The City. I think that's quite a nice tip which I will try when I hit the gym next!

Thanks for the post you have made my day! :o)

X.I.R said...

Thanks Esque! Aren't those t-shirts great! I should fill my whole closet with them. I meant to say a few things about stress in my last post but ran out of room. I think stress is one of the reasons my weight trickles off rather than falls off!

Hey Glitzer! That tip really can work. I am a big Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel fan. I have all the DVD's and there was a time when I would only allow myself to watch them when I was on the treadmill. Recently, I used the Twilight books on tape. I would only listen to them in the car or on the treadmill. Now I need something new to use ( I have already seen all the Sex and the City episodes) :)

Anonymous said...

Hi from Rockport TX. Rv'ing our way home to Canada. We have a strong internet signal here and I want to say THANKS for keeping up the great blog of inspiration! 2 more Kreative Awards! Yay! You are so deserving. I love your blogs. All the best with your goals. Keep smilin'! ~ Uxcritter

X.I.R said...

Hey Uxcritter! Hope you had a great trip! Thanks for all your kind words about my blog. It is something I really enjoy doing! It keeps me motivated and gives everyone else something to laugh at :)

Dr.Karen. said...

An important point to note when going food shopping or planning your meal is that there are no foods that contain only a single nutrient, unless it has been processed and refined, as in refined sugar. Just about every natural food contains multiple nutrients, so you have to choose the food by its major content. For example, rice—which is a major carbohydrate food—contains 77% carbohydrates, but also 6% protein, and 1% fat. With beef, depending on which portion, the counts are around 20% protein, anywhere from 5%-30% fat, and negligible carbohydrates. http://www.phentermine-effects.com

X.I.R said...

Thanks for the info Doc!

SlightlySlim said...

I, too, am jealous of those who say the weight "just fell off." Sigh.

X.I.R said...

slightly slim, yep. It is so irritating. my weight barely dribbles off :(

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